Tink's Birthday

Tink had been on a countdown to her birthday for quite a while. As the amount of days until her birthday dropped under a week, she started getting a bit stressed about it; she wasn't seeing preparations for it, I guess. She had spotted a CD that was supposed to be for her birthday about 2 weeks before but she hadn't seen anything else. The day before her birthday, Sunday, I wrapped her presents and put them in a visible, but out of the way and hard to reach, place. She calmed down. And she didn't touch the presents that day.

So, Happy Tinker's birthday. She told both me and her dad "Happy Birthday," I assume she told Morg that too. We did our morning chores and where having a little sit-down time before I got up to make her a no-bake cheesecake, which is the only kind of "cake" she will eat. The next thing I know, Morg is saying, "Did you know Tink has some of her presents open?" That is what we get for turning our back for a minute. She had 3 out of 4 DVDs opened. She decided it was her birthday and she wanted her presents. I had to go get the remaining gifts and protect them while we got everything else ready.

I got the cheesecake ready and we sand "Happy Birthday" which Tink can't stand. She blew out her candles and then opened her last DVD. She wasn't as interested in the other 3 packages because they were not the right shape for a CD or DVD but we coaxed her into opening them. They were shirts, one with Alice in Wonderland, one with Pocahontas, and one with Scooby Doo. She did like them and even held them up in front of her to "model" them of sorts.

A little while later we headed into town for a movie. We still owed Morg a movie for her birthday but a chance for us to go did not correspond with a movie we/she wanted. But there is a movie playing right now that Morg did want to see and not one Tink has mentioned but she does like going to the movies. So we all went to see the Thor movie. It was entertaining and Tink did real good. There is a movie coming out very soon she does want to see, "Frozen" is the name. But this time we are hitting the matinee like we usually do. I could believe the cost for the 4 of us, and it isn't a pricey place.

We got home after the movie and Tink immediately started her Christmas countdown figuring her birthday was over.

Today has been a hard day for her but I am not real sure why. She seems angry. We have had some internet issues today, very slow connections and at least twice it just stopped working but came back before I could call about it. That might be the cause of the mood.

Oh, and the cow is recovering nicely.

A.W.O.L.

The milk cow we have had for years, the matriarch if you will, had her calf on Friday the 15th, in the mid-afternoon. This was unusual because she has always caved on a holiday of some sort. I was really expecting the calf on Veteran's Day. And as it turns out the calf was a little over-cooked--it really should have been born a few days before--right about Veteran's Day. It is a bull calf and we decided to call it A.W.O.L. because it didn't "report for duty" on time. And he had to be retrieved, he wasn't coming on his own. He was a bit big with a big head and his front feet were not in the right position. He got stuck and we had to pull him. It wasn't easy, between the cow and Ron both giving everything they had, that calf still almost didn't make it out. It was taking so long we both thought the calf was probably dead. Ron is not a little guy. We only managed to get one foot forward of the nose so the rope was only on that one leg, and he was using all his weight and strength pulling. I wouldn't have made a dent, I am half his size and am still coming back from a few years of malnutrition. Ron was pulling so hard I thought he was going to pull the calf's leg off, but at this point we didn't have hope for the calf. And then the little guy, with just his head and one foot sticking out, opened up his eyes and looked right at me. So the calf was still alive but still stuck and now we were afraid of killing it but the cow was the primary concern. I really do not know how to explain all this well, a stuck calf is something that kind of needs to be experienced first hand to really understand, it goes beyond just the standard "cow needs a little help so we gotta pull the calf." This guy was *stuck.* Sometimes when it is this bad, in order to try to save the cow, someone goes in and cuts the calf up to take it out in pieces. Either that or the cow will most certainly be lost. But that did not prove to be necessary. And since I already told you we named it I am sure you deduced that calf is still alive. He was a bit slow coming to his feet but that was a very traumatic birth soo…

But now the cow. Even once the calf is out, the trauma of the birth is still an issue for the cow. A pinched nerve during birth is common anytime a calf needs pulled, let alone one this stuck; heck every once in a while it happens on an normal birth. The pinched nerve issue will put a cow down because she can't feel one or both back legs. If they stay down, they will get worse because their own weight will start shutting off blood flow to the legs and you loose them. If you can keep them up, sometimes the feeling returns and everything is fine. Getting an animal that weighs roughly 1000 lbs. from a laying to a standing position is not really something that a person can do without the help of machines. And sometimes it injures the cow.

But Lily, though unsteady, stayed on her feet after the birth. Heck, she is a tough Irish gal. Everything seemed fine until Saturday midday when she was laying down more and not getting up easy when coaxed. Then a few hours later she lay down by the fence next to the creek bed and after getting a little time to rest was coaxed to get up, she tried and couldn't. This is a problem. A bit later her rump started to slide under the fence. Ron started calling around for help, we had to get her out from under the fence and we had to get her up. While this was going on she managed to get herself out from under the fence. What a good girl she is. She was in stage 2 of milk fever, we should have noticed the signs in stage 1, she drug it out longer than that stage usually lasts, she was dragging out stage 2 pretty long too, thankfully. By the time a cow hits stage 3 the chance of saving them drops significantly. Ron found someone with the stuff we needed but it was most of the way to town to go get the stuff, treatment for milk fever and these things called hip huggers that are used with a tractor to lift a down cow. We also had a neighbor at ready with a tractor to use. But since lifting an animal that size often does damage in itself the best thing to do is give the med for milk fever and hope they get up on their own. We were ready to cut the fence but we couldn't let her slide down the slope into the creek. She made that unnecessary; she never was good at respecting fences anyway. It did take two doses of the med but about 45 -50 min. after the first dose she could be coaxed up. She looked around for just a moment and didn't see her calf so she headed right to the calf pen, which she knew had to be where he was if she couldn't see him, unsteady but with purpose she made her way there. Of course he was there, she knows that where the calves are put for safety at night, and by this time it was night. She started nosing the hay and started eating. A bit later when Ron went out he gave her some grain in the calf pen but she followed him out, took a big drink of water and walked right into the milking stall -- where she believes she should eat.

Today she is a little off her feed but is standing. We will give her another dose of the treatment today if Ron can find a place on Sunday that sells it. If not I guess a another special trip to town tomorrow and we will hope some molasses on her feed, both making it more palatable and adding calcium, will get her going.

She is 12, we have had her since she was under 6 months old. For the last 9 or 10 years this gal has been giving us milk and meat (by way of offspring), she really does a lot for our family, is part of it, and her loss would be horrible.

On another note, hunting season, firearm, started this weekend (one of the reasons the cow wasn't up on the hill when she went into labor and would have made the situation deadly). But it is almost 70 degrees out, not good for hunting deer. I am in a t-shirt. And good golly is it windy today. When I let the chickens out this morning a gust hit that actually blew some of them up against the fence. Sitting way down here in the holler means we don't usually get much wind at all so to have gusts like that is incredible. I am glad I don't live on the ridge.

Some Things About My Tinker

Just some little things that probably seem like nothing to most people. Tink is soon to be 17 and she has been counting down to her birthday for, gosh, over two months now. We had been wondering if she could keep more than one countdown at a time; earlier this year we found out she could, at least she could do a long and short count. A short count is under a week, a long count is, obviously, longer. We found out just this last month she can keep two long counts as we approached Halloween and she had her birthday countdown. So that is pretty cool. I wonder how many counts she can keep.

Today there was something that stood out that really put me to writing this. She has had a DVD, for quite a few years, of "An American Tail." If you don't know the movie it doesn't matter, it is an animated kids movie. There is an "Extra" on the DVD that is a counting game that is about the level of a 5 - 6 year old. A bunch of coins drop that are different colors and have different symbols on them and then it asks for  "How many  ______?" and list the numbers 1 - 10, or something, and the kid has to choose the right amount to move on. Tink always did great with the first two levels, well, once we actually got her to listen to what was being asked for, but the third level asked for combinations; instead of "How many hearts?" or, "How many blue ones?" it would be "How many blue hearts?" Tink was not real keen on the combo questions. Today she is wearing a Halloween t-shirt with a big owl on it along with a few ghosts and a handful of bats. I asked her what was on her shirt, she told me "owl." I asked her what "that" was as I pointed to a ghost and she said "ghost." I asked her how many ghosts and she counted them for me, (there are three). Then I asked about the bats; she told me what they were and I asked how many and she told me six, there are six. I then asked how many black bats and she counted them and said four. I am standing ther just amazed but don't want to get too excited and freak her out. I asked "How many orange bats?" And she counted the two orange ones. Pretty durn good for a kid diagnosed as so low functioning we were never supposed to be able to potty train her.

And not to be indelicate, but she is able to handle her monthly period herself with the use of adult diapers instead of pads or tampons; and she does not potty in the diapers, they are for her period and she knows it.

I mentioned a couple weeks ago that our internet went out for for a little bit and how Tink did. The day after I wrote that our power was knocked out. The power Co. said someone knocked a tree down on the line. It was out for a few hours. That was not as easy for her as just the internet, there was no movies she could play or anything. Ron pulled out an old Littlest Pet Shop game that hasn't seen the light of day in eight years and three of us played, Morg was too busy being a teen. It took one game for us to remember how to play, a second game went pretty weel, and you have to understand the whole time Tink is playing she is angry and crying. Towards the end of the second game every time she moves her piece she kind of grinds it into the space it landed on. By the third game she is in quite a state and between her turns is running into the other room and throwing herself on the floor, amongst other things. About halfway through this third game the power comes back on. Tink starts crying differently and saying, "I missed you" and "I love You" and started hugging me. It wasn't me she was talking to though, it was electricity that she loves and missed. That is okay, she tells me she loves me all the time. Okay, so the power is back on and she runs around the house turning on all the TVs and setting up the movies, and gets her computer up and running --- then she sits back down to finish the game, happy as could be. Ron and I were both surprised to no end; we didn't expect her back to finish the game.

She has been getting very good at answering yes or no, or similar, questions without being prompted for an answer. That is good because now we are sure if it is one or the other and not that she is just repeating the last word we say: "yes or no?" "no," or "no or yes" "yes." Aside from being much easier on us it shows a new level of understanding for her.

She knows the days of the week, maybe by name, maybe not, I used to make her say them but haven't in a while, but she gets dressed herself on every Sunday, Tuesday, and Thursday now. That means she is going to town for french fries in her head. I am not sure why she got the Tuesday and Sunday but I do know where Thursday came from. On any other day she chooses "home" over "town." if asked, she will get dressed to go to town on an off day if she has to.

She can also find November, her birth month on a calendar.

She absolutly will not allow me to sing, hum, dance, or anything of the like, nor will she tolerate whistling; I think the whistling hurts her ears but that doesn't account for the other stuff, not that I am the only one she doesn't want to sing.

Children are raised, and disciplined, very different now than they used to be. I was sort of in the mid-transition period, now we are sort of in the latter-transition period. Right now even yelling at a child is easily construed as abuse. When Tink goes into a full-blown meltdown -- otherwise unreachable -- If I get into her face and yell her name, she will focus on me and I have a chance, right then, to reach her. I have shocked many a person, even Ron initially because of the force of my voice, to the point of where I could see in their faces that it might be abuse. But if I can catch it, her attention for a split second, I can then talk to her and start calming her. If a good meaning person who is so sure I am doing the wrong thing interferes, and it has happened, the chance is lost. And it is usually the person tells me a child tunes out yelling but will listen to a whisper. Yeah, she can't hear the flippin' whisper while she is in meltdown. I am not totally against spanking, obviously there is an "age out" time and Tink doesn't fit anymore but that isn't why I brought this up. Before we left Colorado, Ron had some appt. in a hospital, Tink was right around 3 years, Morg was under 6 months. Ron was in with the doc, or tech, or whoever, and Tink was starting to stress. She laid down on the floor and started making swimming motions. I thought that was very cool and resourceful of her to come up with such a mild stress release compared to some of the other things she had done or could do. Two elderly women were sitting in the chairs that backed the ones I was in with tiny Morg, unaware that I was the mother of the girl swimming on the floor. One said to the other something about how a good spanking would make that child behave more appropriately in public. I turned my head and politely asked the woman, me with a new babe in arms, if she was spanked as a child. She proudly stated she was. I told her, "In that case, it doesn't work, because what you just said was one of the most inappropriate things I had ever heard." I did take a moment to tell her about Tink being autistic and how people always seem to know how to raise other people's children. Then, speaking about fears of false abuse reports, just a few minutes later, Ron comes back and we have to walk a little ways to a different area of the hospital, Tink walking with us easily until she realizes we are not leaving yet, she stops in the hall, people all around us. I have Morg in my arms and gently give a directional push to Tink's shoulder--she would not hold hands at that time, and calling on every scrap of theatrics she had, and it was a good amount, she threw herself into the air and onto the ground 4 foot away from where she had been, slowly picks her head up and turns it to look at me with a confused and scared expression. As I said, the hallway had many people and I am now standing there looking very much like I just threw my child, forcibly, to the ground.  I heaved a big sigh, stuck my hand down to help her up and calmly asked her not to do that anymore as people do not realize that she is pretending. It worked, for both her (for that visit) and the people in the hospital.

I am not sure she would technically qualify as autistic anymore. If the diagnosis is anything like it was when she was first diagnosed, four things from three separate categories of symptoms, she might not. She would still be what is commonly called PDD-NOS, which is pervasive developmental disorder - not otherwise specified, and is an "almost autism;" three things from three categories or seven things from only two categories instead of the four from three. She is mid-functioning, instead of the low-functioning she was initially diagnosed; still a long ways from self-responsible but not as hard for a care-taker. Aside from food issues, understanding the spoken word has always been Tink's biggest problem. That is getting better and in a way almost contrary to what "studies" say about learning languages. It is almost like her language learning is in slow motion and given another 50 years, or so, she might have the spoken language skills of a 10 year old. Thank goodness other things go quicker. The kid is far from stupid. And her "acting" is not autistic in nature. Repeating lines from movies, over and over, is very autistic; to understand the interplay of acting is not; she has always done her acting.

I used to read to her all the time. I can't remember when, specifically, she decided I was not going to do that anymore but she was quite adamant about it. Years went by and we would occasionally try to read to her to no avail. Then, one time, she let Ron read to her to get her ready for bed, he kept it up. Then he kind of needed a break so I tried, nope, had to be dad. So for a bout 3 1/2  to 4 years Ron has read a story to her, first time he really could not, I don't recall why, she got mad and would not let me. The next time she put up with me doing it, now if he can’t I have to (I have no problem with it) but if he can, I cannot.

And she handled Ron being gone okay but she is glad he is back. He didn't get to see Lake Erie but he did get to add two more states, Indiana and Ohio. I have travelled more in one year, more than once, than he has in his life. I wonder sometimes if we should have opted for the RV life instead of homestead life; it was an option at the time.    

All Hallow's Day aka The Day after Halloween

Everyone is a little burnt out from yesterday but poor Ron agreed to go with the neighbor to Ohio tomorrow and had to run to town and do some other last min ute things. The neighbor bought a half-built two-seater airplane he wants to go pick up. He had been asking Ron for days to take a trip hear or there for him to go look at a plane he wanted to buy; I don't remember all the places but one was Florida. Then he called Ron up yesterday morning to ask if he would go to Ohio with him today (Friday). Ron said he couldn't do it today but probably could arrange going tomorrow (Saturday). The guy told him he would think about postponing it for a day but he would probably just go alone; he would call back by evening with his decision. I guess his wife put her foot down and said if he didn't have another person he wasn't going. We got a call last night from her thanking Ron for going, I guess he was a little too embarrassed to call. Ron has mixed feelings about going, and I really don't want him to go, but he hasn't traveled as much as I have and it'll be good for him. He will be just shy of an hour from Lake Erie and I told him to make sure they take the time to go see it; that will be his second Great Lake. He has never seen an ocean. So, he will be gone a few days.

Tink dressed as a witch yesterday, and Morg was sort of zombie-ish. Both to old for trick or treating but Tink was insistent we do something for Halloween. So we piled in the car and stopped at the country store at the curve in the highway and they had candy and hot dogs to roast and marshmallows too, and people we knew. We hung out there for about 45 min. and piled n the car again to stop at the little store just a ways up the highway, just to show the girls off to the owner as she didn't have anything Halloweeny going on, and got some homemade cookies. Back in the car to stop at a church at the highway intersection that had a "trunk or treat" thing. Then we stopped at some friends house that we traditionally stop at every Halloween even if we do nothing else; they are the folks we bought this place from. I don't understand why we stopped there before doing the stuff in town we planned but Ron had pulled in and they had already seen us before I realized he was stopping. We were there for a little while--really should have done it last thing like usual. When we got back in the car it was already too late to do a couple of the other trunk or treats in town but we went to the radio station which was one open a little later and  Tink was totally ignoring this clown that was trying to engage her until I told her to follow him "right over there" and he was going to show the girls a trick She followed him and took his candy offering and giggled when he said something--completely appropriate giggling. Then his trick was grabbing this pig heart out of bloodyish looking water claiming it was his heart and then he made it "beat." Tink screamed, she was smiling but she screamed like Fay Wray. The clown guy got a little concerned he flipped her out, the look on his face… I started laughing, Tink stopped screaming, giggled a bit, then screamed again, then the clown laughed realizing she was just playing along. Then we went to the one house in town that is always massively Halloweened out where Tink practiced her acting skills again. Then to McDonald's fro some fries. Which if we had done the town thing first, we would have had a couple more stops and then could have done the fries and then our yearly Halloween visit, Tink would have been happy to be there instead of throwing a tantrum almost the whole time we were there. Oh well.

The pumpkin carving was funny. Morg didn't want to but Brianna did, untill she found out she had to stick her hand in the pumpkin to clean it. Ron couldn't get her to stick her hand in that mess for anything; he did try. She wound up grabbing a spoon on her own and doing a little but then just bolted from the room and wouldn't come back in until the pumpkin was empty.

There is this guy, we have known for about 7 or 8 years, who bow hunts and it is bow season right now. He is a single guy with a bit of land; that land allows him to take quite a few deer every year, way more than he can use but he like to bowhunt. A few months ago, Ron was talking to a neighbor (not the one he is going on the road trip with) about a mutual friend who died a few years back that always gave us his extra venison and he mentioned this in the conversation. This bow hunter guy was there at the time. All of the sudden, in the last week, this guy has stopped by with the meaty parts of 3 deer he has killed. Nice. Even nicer is this guy field cleans and de-bones the meat, the other guy gave us the critter and we cleaned it. Most of the meat is from older animals and is only good for grinding or jerky, but that is fine. Regular firearm season will be starting soon and we usually get a nice critter for letting the deer camp folks hang their meat in our feed room. Most people won't hang carcasses by their cattle, especially milkers, because it makes them act uh, stupid is what most people say, I call it angry. It does not seem to phase our milk cow and in turn it doesn't phase her daughter, our other milker. So we go ahead and hang them, right there next to the milking stall to the disbelief of most folks.